Brian Sauder on Conflict Resolution and Crucial Conversations

Brian Sauder joins Larry Kreider to share how we can communicate effectively and healthily resolve conflict. Brian stresses the importance of being self-aware and understanding your part in a disagreement, how communication via technology can be hard to interpret, and to remember that everyone has different giftings, passions, and conflict styles that generate unique perspectives.

6 Steps to Resolving Conflict:

1. Gain agreement that there is a problem.
2. Identify the consequences upfront.
3. Pray together in faith and ask for wisdom and solutions.
4. Mutually agree on some actions.
5. Follow up and measure progress.
6. If the conflict cannot be resolved after the follow-up, seek help from an objective outside source that you both trust.

Quotable Quotes:

• "If we don't have conflict, it means we're not around people."
• "Conflict will and does exist."
• "Bad communication leads to conflict."
• "Seek to understand rather than to be understood." —Stephen Covey
• "Everyone doesn't have to agree, and everybody's not meant to work together."
• "Let the Lord defend us."
• "Tell the facts and not our story."

Highlights:

• How you deal with conflict will determine how successful your ministry is and how healthy your relationships are.
• What you said and what you think you said are two different things.
• The words you use make up only 7% of your conversations. 
• 55% of a conversation is non-verbal.
• Forgiveness is paramount in overcoming conflict.
• James 5:17
• James 4
• Matthew 7:3
• Proverbs 18 
• Esther 4:14
• Become aware of your weaknesses and humble yourself.
• Do not compare yourself to others.
• Proverbs 26:17
• Don't meddle and insert yourself into issues that don't involve you.

Mentioned in Today's Episode:

• DOVE International
• DOVE Canada
• DOVE Global Leadership & Ministry School
• Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High by Joseph Grenny, Kerry Patterson, Ron McMillan, Al Switzler, and Emily Gregory
• Team Profile by Bobb Biehl
• Passing the 21 Tests of Leadership by Larry Kreider
• Ask Larry

Related Resources:

• "Brian Sauder on Understanding Role Preferences and Maximizing Your Team"

For more information about Larry Kreider, his books, daily devotionals, small group resources, or other teachings, visit larrykreider.com